Your Pillars of Self

I think I can confidently say I’m not the only one that’s had a crisis of self over the last 2 years. Our lives have been shaken so completely that our identities have been challenged. Who are we without our jobs, our social activities, our ability to do most of the things that make up our lives? A terrifying question truly.

My TBR (to be read) list this year consists of many rereads. The Robert Langdon books and revisiting Inkworld are top of the list. In 2020 I discovered some amazing books so why would I take this step backward?

I asked myself that same question and I realized I needed to get reacquainted with my passions, those pillars that have sparked the greatest growths in myself. I wanted to prioritize my passions this year, delving deeper into those things that I love and helped shape who I am; my pillars of self.

For me this includes listening to Jim Croce, The Pretty Reckless, and Led Zeppelin as well as revisiting those paper worlds of my past. When I posted on my Instagram (@heathersstories) that I vowed to explore my passions deeper this year, I got quite the response. Clearly others are feeling something similar.

Today we are encouraged to constantly go forward. You have to find something new. You need to find the next big thing, be ahead of the trend. Why? I’ve found myself going backwards. Listening to records and exploring the fashions of the late 19th to mid-20th century has brought me more into the present moment. There are so many wonderful communities online that explore the ways of the past. The great thing about today is we can discover and replicate those things we love from the past and bring them into our present life.

By spending time with these pillars of self I’m reminded of my priorities. I’m reminded of why I am how I am, why I love what I love. With the world forcing our eyes forward we rarely look down at where we are and who we really are. We leave ourselves behind.

Constantly trying to catch up because we have lost those 2+ years has left many of us weary. All our energy is accounted for whether it’s work, finally going to events, or trying to work off the weight we’ve gained we don’t seem to have much mental space to think about what is within us. When we do look within it is mostly to chastise not to nourish.

I hereby give you permission to go backward. Reacquaint yourself with yourself. Don’t read or watch or listen to anything new if you don’t wish. Only make the food from your childhood or play the games that have gotten dusty. Sometimes going backwards is the best way forward.

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